Saturday, September 29, 2007

Why we dream

I awoke in the middle of the night. The restroom was four rooms away from mine. A long walk, yes, especially if you want to sleep some more. But my bladder was going to burst big time. Besides, I was too old to pee in bed.

Relieved, I set out to sleep the moment I got back. I attempted to continue the dream that was interrupted. Sadly, the virtual movies that play in our minds while we're asleep have a way of evaporating, unnoticed, into the land of the forgotten. This was no exception.

I twisted and turned, waiting for sleep to come. It wasn't a severe case of insomnia, but it was enough to give me a headache.

Of course I tried counting sheep, but they looked so unfamiliar and detached as they hopped from one side of the fence to the other, floating in mid-air fashion, that I just had to stop. I resorted to thinking happy thoughts instead, imagining I was in some place in the Pacific, lying on a hammock, drinking from a coconut with a long, colorful straw. The picture was way out of reality and downright impossible that it kept me from thinking further.

But aren't dreams supposed to be like that?

In a graded impromptu speech I made in class, I was asked which I would prefer: to eat or to sleep. I chose the latter. It's a form of escape, I reasoned. Escape from reality, from the problems and stresses of life. Sleep gives way to dreaming, I added, and it is in dreams where we rediscover what we want and who we truly are. I ended my talk by saying that, no matter how we may choose to sleep forever, we have to wake up because we cannot really detach ourselves from reality, can we?

Maybe the reason why people get crazy is that they want some form of escape, and they want it permanent.

Maybe the same goes for suicide. Sadly, death does not offer an escape, it leads to a dead end.

But why? Why do people choose to kill themselves, like Rey's childhood friend who ended his life some two days ago? At the edge of my bed, in what seemed to be a sleepless night, I grappled for answers. And I could only find one. These people don't know God enough to trust Him. God always lifts the veil of darkness and sorrow, He always leads us to greener pastures of comfort and delight, He always provides and is always in control, no matter what the situation is. And if God does not immediately provide the solution to our cares, He always gives some form of temporary escape.

That's why we dream.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

very well said lance. amen to that. frankly i really admire the way you sleep and dream, with all the stuffed pillows you have beside you. hahaha.. God bless you lance. may God put an exclamation point to your dreams. Good night, i'll be dreaming now...

Thu Oct 04, 02:59:00 AM GMT+8  
Blogger Lance said...

grabe, you "really admire the way [I] sleep and dream." na-conscious tuloy ako, jeiel! hahah!

i only have two pillows eh, pero mukhang marami siguro kasi malalaki!

Thu Oct 04, 08:48:00 PM GMT+8  

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