Tough month

Another month has ended. These days, I only force myself to blog whenever the month ends, if only to place bookends to chapters of personal experiences inside and outside the hospital for the past 30 or so days. For sure, I have many stories to tell, but I no longer have the drive to write about them every time they happen. In college, I used to write almost twice a week—those entries can be accessed to this day. Admittedly, many of the posts embarrass me if you read them to me aloud. Really—I wrote about my Biology exam that way?

Is this slowness, this circumspection, a function of age and strength? Or have I seen enough of the Internet to know that the things I write might be misconstrued, misquoted, or misrepresented so much so that I tend to overthink, erring on the side of not writing anything at all lest something untoward happens?

* * *

January has been a tumultuous month. I should write about this soon, but this involved my mother—who has never been sick before, save for the seasonal cough and colds—getting hospitalized, flying to Metro Manila to have more tests done, and undergoing a kidney biopsy. The Lord, Who knows exactly what we go through, provided for her treatment, gave her strength, and offered opportunities for my mother to encourage her friends and family. Her biopsy showed a benign disease entity that should resolve on its own, without the need for medications. A heavy load was taken off my chest when I learned about it.

I got to think about mortality, about how short life is on earth, about how fragile the human body is, especially when it ages. Through all these things, the sweet doctrine of the sovereignty of God was my source of hope—surely, my mother’s kidneys could not escape God’s omnipotent eye. I prayed that my family and I would glorify God whatever that outcome: whether my mother’s prognosis was good or bad, whether she should undergo hemodialysis for life or not.

She and Tatay have flown back to Koronadal. Their flight was delayed. A welcoming party of sorts was being prepared at home. May the Lord be praised.

2 thoughts on “Tough month”

  1. Kuya Lance, I'm glad to see another blog entry from you. Indeed, God is good and faithful all the time!

    Keep on writing, you are a blessing to your readers!

    -Dennis

  2. Lance!
    I am glad to know that your mom is well and good now. I'll continue to pray for her and for your entire family.
    -AA

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