Monday, April 16, 2007

Spartan men have 300-packed abs

Finally I did get to watch the movie 300. The experience before I entered the moviehouse was rather harrowing: I was asked, for the nth time now, what my age was--in a PG13 an R13 movie! Imagine my dismay at the incapability of the guard in-charge to see my growing moustache, my deep masculine voice, and my muscular physique that only real men possess.

Lance: Nagstart na po ba ang 300?
Guard: Oo, kanina pa. Pero pwede ka nang pumasok.
Lance: Ah okay. 'Eto ang ticket ko.
Guard: Teka, ilang taon ka na?
Lance: Nineteen.
Guard: Sigurado ka?
Lance: Oo naman.

Now the movie was fun to watch. I liked how the blood literally gushed out when heads were decapitated--it resembled the geysers we see in Yellowstone National Park. The dialogue was rather amusing, too, especially the line, "Only Spartan women give birth to real men." Who'd forget the abs that I could only dream of having? And man, the graphics and special effects were awesome!

At the beginning of the movie, there was a scene showing an old man discarding small, frail newly-borns into the bottom of the cliff, where small baby skulls were lying--the movie's version of unnatural selection. Now if I were born during that time and in that place I have no doubt that I would've been thrown out. My body would've made a good fertilizer for their farms.


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